SEEING ONESELF

British Museum

Illustrations to Young's Night Thoughts

What is it that we try to hide from Ourselves?

In this passage Albion is attempting to hide Jerusalem. Albion has fallen in love with Vala, the Veil that forms a curtain which makes Nature appear enticing to the inner man. So Albion is torn between Vala and Jerusalem who functions as the light which makes the Divine Vision visible to Albion. Believing that he has sinned and unable of accept forgiveness, Albion wants at all costs to hide Jerusalem, thus concealing his error.

Without the light which Jerusalem would provide, Albion went through the motions of self-annihilation without being honest with himself. He tried to cover up his error by turning away from the inner realization and toward trying to make amends to his Children. He tried to cover himself with moral virtue while projecting cruel laws. He had closed an avenue of restoring his ability to see the Divine Vision, hence he embarked on a journey through alienation and suffering.

Jerusalem, Plate 22, (E 167)
"Then spoke Jerusalem O Albion! my Father Albion
Why wilt thou number every little fibre of my Soul               
Spreading them out before the Sun like stalks of flax to dry?
The Infant Joy is beautiful, but its anatomy 
Horrible ghast & deadly! nought shalt thou find in it
But dark despair & everlasting brooding melancholy!

Then Albion turnd his face toward Jerusalem & spoke              

Hide thou Jerusalem in impalpable voidness, not to be
Touchd by the hand nor seen with the eye: O Jerusalem
Would thou wert not & that thy place might never be found
But come O Vala with knife & cup: drain my blood
To the last drop! then hide me in thy Scarlet Tabernacle 

For I see Luvah whom I slew. I behold him in my Spectre
As I behold Jerusalem in thee O Vala dark and cold

Jerusalem then stretchd her hand toward the Moon & spoke

Why should Punishment Weave the Veil with Iron Wheels of War
When Forgiveness might it Weave with Wings of Cherubim          

Loud groand Albion from mountain to mountain & replied
Plate 23
Jerusalem! Jerusalem! deluding shadow of Albion!
Daughter of my phantasy! unlawful pleasure! Albions curse!
I came here with intention to annihilate thee! But
My soul is melted away, inwoven within the Veil
Hast thou again knitted the Veil of Vala, which I for thee       
Pitying rent in ancient times. I see it whole and more
Perfect, and shining with beauty! But thou! O wretched Father! 

Jerusalem reply'd, like a voice heard from a sepulcher:
Father! once piteous! Is Pity. a Sin? Embalm'd in Vala's bosom
In an Eternal Death for. Albions sake, our best beloved.         
Thou art my Father & my Brother: Why hast thou hidden me,
Remote from the divine Vision: my Lord and Saviour.

Trembling stood Albion at her words in jealous dark despair:
He felt that Love and Pity are the same; a soft repose!
Inward complacency of Soul: a Self-annihilation!                 

I have erred! I am ashamed! and will never return more:
I have taught my children sacrifices of cruelty: what shall I answer?
I will hide it from Eternals! I will give myself for my Children!
Which way soever I turn, I behold Humanity and Pity!

He recoil'd: he rush'd outwards; he bore the Veil whole away     
His fires redound from his Dragon Altars in Errors returning.
He drew the Veil of Moral Virtue, woven for Cruel Laws,
And cast it into the Atlantic Deep, to catch the Souls of the Dead.
He stood between the Palm tree & the Oak of weeping 
Which stand upon the edge of Beulah; and there Albion sunk       
Down in sick pallid languor! These were his last words, relapsing!"